A and R hosted fight night at their house. A is painting her nails when I get there, even though the preliminary fights are on. She has no interest in that. She has a sort of obsession with painting her nails. So I sit and watch her because she's drawing trees with blossoms on her thumbs and it looks freaking awesome and I'm amazed at what she can achieve with a little bobby pin. Once her nails start to dry she decides we need some snacks. I ask if she has any cookies, because I love cookies, and she actually does.
She has frozen Reeses peanut butter cookie dough so we start to bake those. Well, she tries and I have to take over because her nails aren't dry enough for her to actually do anything useful. Directions on the box say heat to such and such and bake for 12 to 14 minutes. Good. We can handle that. Wait, wait wait. A opens the oven before it's time and I tell her not to do that. Wait some more. Check cookies at 12 minutes. Whoa! They are totally not done. Think they'll be done in 2 more minutes? Ugh. What the heck.... Wait some more. A opens the oven again before it's time. Damn you woman. Stop it! Check again in 2 minutes. Nope, not done. Wait more than 20 minutes total, all while trying to get A to stop opening the oven door, and take the cookies out. Awesome. Still kinda not done in the middle and burnt on the bottom. Damn it. A blames me. Try another batch. A takes charge this time and takes the cookies out when they look undone...but it's ok because she taste tested them before taking them out and they're done, they just don't look done. She used the spatula to cut a cookie in half and take it out of the oven for testing purposes, because she didn't want to waste time looking for one of those silly oven mitt things. Safety first! K plays super waitress and walks around handing out fresh cookies to all the boys watching the fights. When people ask about the burnt ones A blames me. I might have to punch her if she keeps doing that. I followed the directions on the stupid box ok!
After some fighting about cookies we settle in to watch the fights.
One of R's friends brought his 2 small girls to fight night. The older one was mostly good. She liked to hang out in front of the fish tank and tell us all of the fishs names. "That one is Nemo. And that ones Nemo. And that one over there is Nemo". A points to a frog and asks if it's name is Nemo. "No silly. That's a frog. Not a fish." Only fish can be named Nemo apparently. And all fish, are in fact named Nemo.
The other girl is much younger. Not talking, barely has control of her legs and likes to play in things like the toilet and the dogs water bowl. We're all watching a fight and dear old daddie keeps having to tell his older girl to get out of the way, stay down, get down, get out of the way, stop walking in front of the tv, getdowngetdowngetdown. Yet, she keeps getting in the way. The baby wants to play with the things under the tv. The Xbox won't affect watching the fights so he lets her play. She pushes the buttons, pulls out all the game cases and remotes. The she stands up, using the tv to steady herself. Dear old daddie pulls her to the side so she's not in the way of the fight but lets her slap her hands all over the bottom of the screen and the side of the tv. I realize I'm watching these children, that I don't even like (because we all know how I feel about the youngins), more than I'm watching the fights which I actually enjoy watching. I also notice dear old daddie is watching the fight instead of watching his kids, but I get it. He wants to see the fights too.
I refocus on the fight. They're on the ground. One guy is going for a lock. It's tense.
And then it's all black.
Baby had pushed the tv's power button.
Damn it.
Oh and how nice, if you push the button too many times you have to wait longer for the tv to turn back on. Of course the baby pushed the button too many times. You know a fight can end in less than a second right? Here we are with a black screen for 20 seconds. My brain was going insane. Dear old daddie says "Whoops! I forgot about the tv buttons hahahaha". Thankfully the fight was basically the same as before it turned off.
Why are you even letting your baby play by the tv? You're at someone else's house where everyone has come to watch the fights on someones else's tv. Why on earth would you let your baby, who if I'm remembering the conversation about dishwashers earlier correctly, likes to push buttons on everything and won't stop until she finds the button that does something, play basically on the tv during the fight? I mean...seriously. Oh it's because she started to cry when you tried to take her away from the tv? Well that doesn't mean she needs to play by the tv! That means she needs to learn that she can't play with everything she wants whenever she wants.
K keeps looking over at me. Whether it's because she feels the same way I do or if it's because she knows how I feel about children and is waiting to see my reaction, I don't know. We decide to retreat away from the children and go back into the kitchen. As A and I gossip (a.k.a. her blaming me for burnt cookies and me threatening her life) we realize that all of R's friends have left. Child free house! Yay! Victory lap! Which ends at the computer where we order pizza because we're hungry. K and G take off and we enjoy our pizza while catching up on Dexter. DVR's really are an awesome invention. After 2 episodes I head home. I'm definitely exhausted and ready to climb into bed.
I'm almost to my street. The car driving in front of me turns down my street. I turn. The car in front of me turns into my driveway. INTO MY DRIVEWAY! It's 1:30 in the morning people. Why are you in my driveway!? This happens to me way too often. I start screaming at them from my car. Flailing my arms, trying to get them to understand that they are in my way. That is my home and they need to move the ef out of my way. As I'm flailing a crackhead (don't judge me for calling them crackheads. They are. I know they are. I live next to these people and I see them and what they do and I know that they are crackheads ok?) wearing no shit, but an open jacket, walks up to my passenger side door. I take in the situation. The car in my driveway has only just started backing up. Crackhead wants me to roll down my window. Car is now blocking the entire street while they decide where to go. I"m blocking half the street and crackhead is in the way and his crackhead girlfriend is standing on the other side of the street blocking the car from moving. I roll my window down a smidge. I stutter a bit and ask him "Uhh whaddya doin?"
"I'm looking for a cigarette. You got one?"
Nope. Sure don't. Don't smoke. Nope.
"Well, where you goin?" He says with a slow grin in a voice that makes me think he's seeing bright colors and monsters hiding in bushes. I'm just trying to drive ok. This dude is in my way and I'm just trying to go. Finally the crackhead girl moves to the sidewalk and the car can finally get out of my way. Only just barley because it's parking basically in front of my driveway. Without looking back at the crackhead I drive. Past my house. Turn the corner. And start to sob. Awesome. I'm exhausted. I just want to sleep. I had to warm my car up for 15 minutes before I could even drive home because it's so cold out. Now I feel like I can't even go home because the crackheads and their terrible driving friends are hanging out in the street in front of my house so no I don't want to go home alone late at night where they can watch me go into my house alone. No. I don't want to do that. So I drive around for half an hour. I make a couple passes by my street. The car is gone and there are no signs of wandering crackheads so I finally pull into my driveway.
I'm tired but too scared to go right to bed. So I put some clothes away and pick up the house a little. I leave the living room light on and head to my bedroom. I turn the tv on and look for something funny to help my mind settle. But there isn't really anything good on at 2 am. I shut off my light but leave my door open so I still get the light from the living room. I grab my mag lite and tuck it into bed next to me, as a weapon. I leave my pepper spray next to the bed....just in case. I fall asleep with the tv on. Fear sleep isn't as restful as normal sleep.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Harry Potter and snow
I went to see the midnight showing of the new Harry Potter movie with M, her boyfriend D and L. We got there around 8:30 expecting to have to stand in line outside. L and I bundled up for the wait only to find out we could sit down right now if we wanted to. We waited for M. While waiting we found a photo booth. L had cash so we hopped in (after finding someone to give us 1's because the machine is picky and doesn't take anything but 1's) and got to business. After figuring out how to get the thing to start taking pictures....and struggling with keeping ourselves in frame because that booth is tiny as hell, we spilled back out into the lobby area and waited for the pictures to print. Surprise surprise! They were already printed. And this kick ass machine prints 2 copies! So we each got one and after deciding which frame was our favorite M finally made it to the theater.
With most of our group here and D not being able to come until later, we headed to the theater to save our seats. M is the hardcore midnight showing of Harry Potter-er, so I let her choose the seats. She chose well. I should have brought a book...
We sit and talk and catch up. M finds a couple of her other friends waiting for the movie to start and disappears. The kids sitting in the seats behind us offer to play Harry Potter trivia. I say ok, but let them know that while I may be here and I certainly have read all of the books, I'm not going to remember a lot of details so I'm probably going to fail. And fail I do. So instead we end up talking about how tall this guy is (6'8"!!! And he's wearing those super tall boot things) and about random stuff until L leaves to go find her coworker friend and tall guy leaves to pick up their other friends. Trivia girl picks up a book and starts reading so I look for a family guy video to watch on my phone until L or M come back.
Finally everyone is here and we sit waiting for the movie, talking about mutual friends and boy issues (because we all have them) and bad roommate situations (because we have all had them) and watch random actors come through the theaters playing Harry Potter scenes for the waiting crowds (good fun btw to have live actors fall down right in front of you. Fake falling can be as funny as real falling).
Finally the movie starts. Yes, I enjoyed it. Yes, I will always recommend the books over the movies because of how much more detail you will get and more story. They just can't fit it all into the movies. However, I do love the movies. I may have shed some tears....good thing we grabbed all those napkins when we got the popcorn.
I was prepared to be mega tired at work on Friday but thanks to some stroke of luck (and a redbull) not only was I totally awake and functional at work, I even got up early and had time to shower, and get cute before starting my day. Course I had to because I wouldn't have time after work. K and K2 were taking me to the mountain after work! Yessss!
Ok, so I'm not usually the most prepared person in the world...and that's totally the case with snow gear. I don't have snow pants...so I threw some long johns on under my jeans and off I went (with a duffel bag filled with sweaters, wool socks, a hat, scarves and gloves) to meet at their place. He's the one with a truck and chains after all. After bundling up we hopped in the truck and headed to the mountain. We made a pit stop for some pizza on the way at a place they love and raved about until we got there. Nope, I don't remember the name of it. When we got there it was busy. We stood in line and were only barely in the door. It started to clear out by the time we finally made it to the front. We watched a party get up and leave...One of the guys had his snow booties on...not the hard you can walk in boots...but these soft weird things that were impossible for him to walk in. They bent and folded from side to side with every step he took. He waddled very slowly out the door while K and I tried our best to hold out laughter in. Then just as he made it out the door, the last girl of the group yelled to him that someone needed to come grab the pizza box on the table. "Someone needs to get this! Come in here and grab this pizza please!"
It should be noted that her legs were working just fine in her normal shoes and her hands were empty. Why didn't she just grab the pizza and give it to him when she got outside instead of making him walk all the way back inside on his wobbly legs? We'll never know...
Got our pizza and headed out the door. Where we found wobble legs and his friends were stuck in the parking lot. Using jumper cables. That doesn't look good. Away we drive! One more quick stop to put air in the inter tube (because I'm not awesome enough to ride a snowboard yet) and after driving for what felt like forever we finally made it to the snowy mountain. Do a couple quick cookies in the empty parking lot before sliding to a neat stop near a small hill to park.
We marvel at the snow and hike up a little ways so K can practice on her new snowboard. She's awesome at it right away. After a couple tries she can get up all on her own, she can ride just fine down our little hill...she just needs to learn how to stop now. While they're flying around at high speed, I'm running in place around the inter tube to keep myself warm. She's still rolling...so I do some jumping jacks. They're talking technique and to keep my mind off the fact that I'll have to learn snow sports from my friends boyfriends because I don't have one of my own to teach me I make shapes in the snow with my footsteps as I jog back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth. My toes finally have feeling again. And my fingers are warm! K2 offers to pull me around on the inter tube so I hop on and he throws me to and fro making me do little tube donuts. Ummm fun! K decides we should find a place where we can properly ride the tube. Do a little snow hiking and find a hill. I'm too scared of where it will end up (it's just below the ski lift) so K2 tests it out for us. Only...the tube doesn't move. He's stuck. The snow is too fluffy and deep. I plop down and start working on the best snow angel ever (not really) and K2 tries to get K to try the bigger hill on her board but since we can't see the bottom it's a bit too scary. He goes off to test out the hill and K and I explore a little. We try to head over to a snow covered tree but we get stuck. The snow is sooooo deep! I take a step and suddenly I'm up to my knee in snow and falling on my face because if one leg is covered in snow to it's knee and the other leg is standing on top of all that snow covering leg number one, I lose my balance and fall over. From there it was all bad. For me. K was fine. K2 found us and laughed with K as I tried desperately to dig my way out of the snow. I couldn't use my arms to help me because they would just fall through the snow like my feet. My feet couldn't get a grip on anything. At one point my entire face was literally rolling in the snow while I tried to get up. Why was my face rolling? Because I was trying to flip myself around so I could get up. Duh. After huffing and puffing for like 10 minutes I was finally back on my feet. K was leaning back all relaxed waiting for me to get my act together. We started over to the tree only this tim K2 developed a technique similar to battle crawling to get over the snow. With your weight more evenly spread out across the snow you didn't sink in as much. Wish I woulda known that before all that work I just did. At least I'm getting a good work out in. And on the weekend no less. Way to go me.
The tree is perfection. Covered in fluffy piles of snow and with a small hut like opening in the middle. K crawled in and perched herself onto an icy branch. It was like a giant throne. We all hung out in there, out of the wind for a little while chatting about nonsense because sometimes people need to vent and the best place to do that is in the snow cave with your best friend. Right?
Catching my breath felt good but as soon as I started to feel my toes go numb I knew I was ready to go. We walked carefully back to the truck and when we got there I realized I was a mess. I was covered in snow from all the strategic rolling I was doing. I forgot that snow melts and turns into water...not mud. Silly me. I climb into the back seat and look at my legs. I'm wearing jeans. And right now they look like I bathed in them. My legs might go numb...it's possible. Thankfully K2's heater works like a charm and I don't lose feeling in anything. My lesson to you: Have fun when you run into quick snow. It's funny for your friends when you're rolling around like a taser victim on your face in the snow.
With most of our group here and D not being able to come until later, we headed to the theater to save our seats. M is the hardcore midnight showing of Harry Potter-er, so I let her choose the seats. She chose well. I should have brought a book...
We sit and talk and catch up. M finds a couple of her other friends waiting for the movie to start and disappears. The kids sitting in the seats behind us offer to play Harry Potter trivia. I say ok, but let them know that while I may be here and I certainly have read all of the books, I'm not going to remember a lot of details so I'm probably going to fail. And fail I do. So instead we end up talking about how tall this guy is (6'8"!!! And he's wearing those super tall boot things) and about random stuff until L leaves to go find her coworker friend and tall guy leaves to pick up their other friends. Trivia girl picks up a book and starts reading so I look for a family guy video to watch on my phone until L or M come back.
Finally everyone is here and we sit waiting for the movie, talking about mutual friends and boy issues (because we all have them) and bad roommate situations (because we have all had them) and watch random actors come through the theaters playing Harry Potter scenes for the waiting crowds (good fun btw to have live actors fall down right in front of you. Fake falling can be as funny as real falling).
Finally the movie starts. Yes, I enjoyed it. Yes, I will always recommend the books over the movies because of how much more detail you will get and more story. They just can't fit it all into the movies. However, I do love the movies. I may have shed some tears....good thing we grabbed all those napkins when we got the popcorn.
I was prepared to be mega tired at work on Friday but thanks to some stroke of luck (and a redbull) not only was I totally awake and functional at work, I even got up early and had time to shower, and get cute before starting my day. Course I had to because I wouldn't have time after work. K and K2 were taking me to the mountain after work! Yessss!
Ok, so I'm not usually the most prepared person in the world...and that's totally the case with snow gear. I don't have snow pants...so I threw some long johns on under my jeans and off I went (with a duffel bag filled with sweaters, wool socks, a hat, scarves and gloves) to meet at their place. He's the one with a truck and chains after all. After bundling up we hopped in the truck and headed to the mountain. We made a pit stop for some pizza on the way at a place they love and raved about until we got there. Nope, I don't remember the name of it. When we got there it was busy. We stood in line and were only barely in the door. It started to clear out by the time we finally made it to the front. We watched a party get up and leave...One of the guys had his snow booties on...not the hard you can walk in boots...but these soft weird things that were impossible for him to walk in. They bent and folded from side to side with every step he took. He waddled very slowly out the door while K and I tried our best to hold out laughter in. Then just as he made it out the door, the last girl of the group yelled to him that someone needed to come grab the pizza box on the table. "Someone needs to get this! Come in here and grab this pizza please!"
It should be noted that her legs were working just fine in her normal shoes and her hands were empty. Why didn't she just grab the pizza and give it to him when she got outside instead of making him walk all the way back inside on his wobbly legs? We'll never know...
Got our pizza and headed out the door. Where we found wobble legs and his friends were stuck in the parking lot. Using jumper cables. That doesn't look good. Away we drive! One more quick stop to put air in the inter tube (because I'm not awesome enough to ride a snowboard yet) and after driving for what felt like forever we finally made it to the snowy mountain. Do a couple quick cookies in the empty parking lot before sliding to a neat stop near a small hill to park.
We marvel at the snow and hike up a little ways so K can practice on her new snowboard. She's awesome at it right away. After a couple tries she can get up all on her own, she can ride just fine down our little hill...she just needs to learn how to stop now. While they're flying around at high speed, I'm running in place around the inter tube to keep myself warm. She's still rolling...so I do some jumping jacks. They're talking technique and to keep my mind off the fact that I'll have to learn snow sports from my friends boyfriends because I don't have one of my own to teach me I make shapes in the snow with my footsteps as I jog back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth. My toes finally have feeling again. And my fingers are warm! K2 offers to pull me around on the inter tube so I hop on and he throws me to and fro making me do little tube donuts. Ummm fun! K decides we should find a place where we can properly ride the tube. Do a little snow hiking and find a hill. I'm too scared of where it will end up (it's just below the ski lift) so K2 tests it out for us. Only...the tube doesn't move. He's stuck. The snow is too fluffy and deep. I plop down and start working on the best snow angel ever (not really) and K2 tries to get K to try the bigger hill on her board but since we can't see the bottom it's a bit too scary. He goes off to test out the hill and K and I explore a little. We try to head over to a snow covered tree but we get stuck. The snow is sooooo deep! I take a step and suddenly I'm up to my knee in snow and falling on my face because if one leg is covered in snow to it's knee and the other leg is standing on top of all that snow covering leg number one, I lose my balance and fall over. From there it was all bad. For me. K was fine. K2 found us and laughed with K as I tried desperately to dig my way out of the snow. I couldn't use my arms to help me because they would just fall through the snow like my feet. My feet couldn't get a grip on anything. At one point my entire face was literally rolling in the snow while I tried to get up. Why was my face rolling? Because I was trying to flip myself around so I could get up. Duh. After huffing and puffing for like 10 minutes I was finally back on my feet. K was leaning back all relaxed waiting for me to get my act together. We started over to the tree only this tim K2 developed a technique similar to battle crawling to get over the snow. With your weight more evenly spread out across the snow you didn't sink in as much. Wish I woulda known that before all that work I just did. At least I'm getting a good work out in. And on the weekend no less. Way to go me.
The tree is perfection. Covered in fluffy piles of snow and with a small hut like opening in the middle. K crawled in and perched herself onto an icy branch. It was like a giant throne. We all hung out in there, out of the wind for a little while chatting about nonsense because sometimes people need to vent and the best place to do that is in the snow cave with your best friend. Right?
Catching my breath felt good but as soon as I started to feel my toes go numb I knew I was ready to go. We walked carefully back to the truck and when we got there I realized I was a mess. I was covered in snow from all the strategic rolling I was doing. I forgot that snow melts and turns into water...not mud. Silly me. I climb into the back seat and look at my legs. I'm wearing jeans. And right now they look like I bathed in them. My legs might go numb...it's possible. Thankfully K2's heater works like a charm and I don't lose feeling in anything. My lesson to you: Have fun when you run into quick snow. It's funny for your friends when you're rolling around like a taser victim on your face in the snow.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Dinner date
Friday night C took me out to dinner at Changs. She kept teasing me about the cook. Asking me f I was excited to see my "husband". Oy vey.
By the way, in case you're wondering, I've given him 2 chances and he flaked out both times so I don't plan on talking to him any more.
Dumbass.
We set up a date and 3 days before we were supposed to go out he stopped talking to me and I couldn't get a hold of him. He text me after S went to Changs a few weeks after that and even though he told her we didn't talk because I was always busy, he told me he had been really busy and that's why he stopped talking. Lame excuse but because I am too nice for my own good (not to mention a wee bit lonely), I gave him another shot. We were supposed to go out last Wednesday. He asked me what day was good for me and I told him. Then he asked me what time and where we should go. I told him that he should make a couple of the choices...seeing as how he's the one that wants to go out, in my mind that means he should take some initiative in the planning. Maybe I'm just old fashioned...but I did make the first move and all so come on. So after I told him he should pick a time and we could decide on a place together...he stopped talking to me AGAIN! Wednesday came and went and I heard nothing. So, no, I wasn't what you would call excited at the possibility of seeing him because I make a weird face when I look at dumbasses and I didn't want to make that face.
Lucky for me he wasn't there. We sat down and enjoyed our hot soup before trying to get food. The line was crazy long when we got there and didn't go down much at all the whole time we were there. The place is always kind of a circus but this time seemed a little extra nuts to me. Once I finally got my food all piled up in the bowls I had to walk all the way around the thingamajigger to get in the line that was now following the wall. It usually stops at the counter separating the cooks and the diners.
In front of me was a woman and her young son. He was excited to watch his food be cooked on the big grill but when he finally made it to the counter he realized he was too short to watch. So he disappeared and came back with a chair to stand on. Right in front of me...making it impossible for me to move forward. Before I could say anything he moved the chair because they moved his bowls. At least now I had room to put my bowls on the counter... He continued to move the chair every time the line moved. Finally his food was done and he got out of my way. Then I got my food and sat down. C was only a few people behind me in line so she was sitting down to eat not too long after me. Good god I love that food.
Of course I went up for seconds because I always do, even though I usually get full after only a couple bites of my second plate and then force myself to eat as much as I can and I never finish and I always make myself sick from stuffing myself so much. This time the line was much shorter but when I finally got to the point where I should be putting my bowls on the counter...this woman got in my way. She stood in the way and then wouldn't move her bowls forward to make room for the people behind her to put their bowls up on the counter even though she had plenty of room. Come on lady! Don't you know Changs etiquette? By the time she finally got with the program my fingers were going numb from holding my bowls so tight...which was of course unnecessary. Silly me. Right when the line started to finally move I was blocked by a child on a chair. Why am I always behind this kid and his chair? This time I just stood on the sidelines and waited for my food in peace.
Or so I thought....Further away from the cooking station was a weird guy....staring at the cooking station with crazy lustful eyes...and a creepy smile to top it all off. He wasn't even waiting for food to cook. He was just standing there watching...and smiling. He totally gave me the hibbie jeebies. Mega time. He was there before I got there and he was still there when I finally got my food and walked back to the table.
Thankfully this time, it seems like I figured out the portions and I didn't get full right away. In fact I finished almost all of it and I didn't feel stuffed at all. Helps that the food tastes so damn good.
I looked around and noticed that now, there was no line at all. Now that C and I are both done eating. Of course. Figures. I see a child walk around the corner. But not just a normal walk. This kid was full on gangsta walkin ya'll! He had the pimp limp and thug fists and everything. It was pretty funny.
We headed to the grocery store to grab a couple of things before heading home. Forgot the ice cream though... Sad face. I thought about heading to the bar to watch some world class karaoke but I ended up being a boring old fuddy duddy and crawled into bed instead.
By the way, in case you're wondering, I've given him 2 chances and he flaked out both times so I don't plan on talking to him any more.
Dumbass.
We set up a date and 3 days before we were supposed to go out he stopped talking to me and I couldn't get a hold of him. He text me after S went to Changs a few weeks after that and even though he told her we didn't talk because I was always busy, he told me he had been really busy and that's why he stopped talking. Lame excuse but because I am too nice for my own good (not to mention a wee bit lonely), I gave him another shot. We were supposed to go out last Wednesday. He asked me what day was good for me and I told him. Then he asked me what time and where we should go. I told him that he should make a couple of the choices...seeing as how he's the one that wants to go out, in my mind that means he should take some initiative in the planning. Maybe I'm just old fashioned...but I did make the first move and all so come on. So after I told him he should pick a time and we could decide on a place together...he stopped talking to me AGAIN! Wednesday came and went and I heard nothing. So, no, I wasn't what you would call excited at the possibility of seeing him because I make a weird face when I look at dumbasses and I didn't want to make that face.
Lucky for me he wasn't there. We sat down and enjoyed our hot soup before trying to get food. The line was crazy long when we got there and didn't go down much at all the whole time we were there. The place is always kind of a circus but this time seemed a little extra nuts to me. Once I finally got my food all piled up in the bowls I had to walk all the way around the thingamajigger to get in the line that was now following the wall. It usually stops at the counter separating the cooks and the diners.
In front of me was a woman and her young son. He was excited to watch his food be cooked on the big grill but when he finally made it to the counter he realized he was too short to watch. So he disappeared and came back with a chair to stand on. Right in front of me...making it impossible for me to move forward. Before I could say anything he moved the chair because they moved his bowls. At least now I had room to put my bowls on the counter... He continued to move the chair every time the line moved. Finally his food was done and he got out of my way. Then I got my food and sat down. C was only a few people behind me in line so she was sitting down to eat not too long after me. Good god I love that food.
Of course I went up for seconds because I always do, even though I usually get full after only a couple bites of my second plate and then force myself to eat as much as I can and I never finish and I always make myself sick from stuffing myself so much. This time the line was much shorter but when I finally got to the point where I should be putting my bowls on the counter...this woman got in my way. She stood in the way and then wouldn't move her bowls forward to make room for the people behind her to put their bowls up on the counter even though she had plenty of room. Come on lady! Don't you know Changs etiquette? By the time she finally got with the program my fingers were going numb from holding my bowls so tight...which was of course unnecessary. Silly me. Right when the line started to finally move I was blocked by a child on a chair. Why am I always behind this kid and his chair? This time I just stood on the sidelines and waited for my food in peace.
Or so I thought....Further away from the cooking station was a weird guy....staring at the cooking station with crazy lustful eyes...and a creepy smile to top it all off. He wasn't even waiting for food to cook. He was just standing there watching...and smiling. He totally gave me the hibbie jeebies. Mega time. He was there before I got there and he was still there when I finally got my food and walked back to the table.
Thankfully this time, it seems like I figured out the portions and I didn't get full right away. In fact I finished almost all of it and I didn't feel stuffed at all. Helps that the food tastes so damn good.
I looked around and noticed that now, there was no line at all. Now that C and I are both done eating. Of course. Figures. I see a child walk around the corner. But not just a normal walk. This kid was full on gangsta walkin ya'll! He had the pimp limp and thug fists and everything. It was pretty funny.
We headed to the grocery store to grab a couple of things before heading home. Forgot the ice cream though... Sad face. I thought about heading to the bar to watch some world class karaoke but I ended up being a boring old fuddy duddy and crawled into bed instead.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Halloween: Night 3
On actual Halloween day I slept in all morning. I stayed in bed all afternoon and didn't think about showering until around 4. I just relaxed and watched some scary movies. (I finally saw the Strangers for the first time. Being home alone is much more scary now.) I thought about staying in bed all day long and not doing anything. I didn't really have anything to do. No laundry, all the dishes were done and the house was clean. I painted my nails already and though T and A invited me to their party I was thinking a night of relaxing sounded too good to pass up. And then my brain said "but you can wear your tutu again!" and that was all it took.
I hopped in the shower and ignored the little spider way up in the corner. I watched some more tv before putting my costume on for the last time. Different fishnets, new top and after a stop in the kitchen to grab an unopened bag of chips and some salsa to take with and I was on my way to the Halloween Rock Band party.
When I got to T and A's house there were trick or treaters tick or treating so I waited for them to finish before I walked to the door. Was I giving them space to make them more comfortable or avoiding contact with children? Probably option B.
Of course everyone looked awesome. These people are seriously creative. Rock Band was already in full swing, as it usually is when I go over there, so I took a seat at the table...you know, near the food. A was just setting out her homemade pumpkin spice chocolate chip muffins and holy crap they were amazing! I ate like 14 of them (ok, maybe 4). I wasn't sitting down for long before T was accepting my challenge. I challenged him? He pulled out connect 4 and set it in front of me. Ok, I will accept your acceptance of my challenge. I win.
New challenger. After a long game and much thought on both our parts...I lose. Damn. Good game sir.
New challenger. She keeps forgetting to think ahead and gets trapped. I have 2 possible wins and she can only block one. She gives in. Win.
Then she's volunteered to sing Lady Gaga. She doesn't totally want to but she is easily convinced. And doesn't sound bad actually. Gypsy's got talent (enough for Rock Band anyway).
Drunk T made me recall Drunk T stories from years past. Of course I start off with the night he and his friends woke me up at 2 am to play twister with them only to have them watch me play twister by myself. How could I say no to the giggling drunks outside my door?
They make T-virus shots, because they're awesome. Twisted twizzlers in the shot glass. Looks like a strand of DNA (abstractish) and apparently taste super good. But don't eat the twizzler if it's been sitting in there long like Z's was. Not so good apparently.
A made Z put on a blond wig. He wouldn't accept help from her or his girlfriend so for 15 minutes we watched put it on, try to straighten it, take it off, fix his real hair, try the wig again, mess it up, take it off, put it on, try the upside down flip technique. I've never seen a wig look so bad so many different ways in such a short amount of time. He finally broke down and let his girlfriend take care of it. Only, that didn't help. Turns out this particular wig on top of his own hair (even when they tried to put his bandanna over the wig) just wasn't working. It was good entertainment though, watching a guy try and fail at putting on a simple wig for so long. I would have expected him to give up long before he did. Persistence: sometimes doesn't work.
You know what's funny about T? He is insanely good at most video games I've seen him play. Back in the day this guy was the master of DDR. I mean... the freaking MASTER! Now here he is, drunk, and playing the drums better than ever before on Rock Band. Who gets better timing and coordination when they're drunk? This dude! One of his newer friends seems shocked by this but it seemed totally normal to me. Him hitting every single note right is totally par for the course with this guy. There are so many notes flying across that screen and he effortlessly hits them all. I can't even keep up with my eyes. It's like watching magic.
Due to it being Sunday night and me having to get up early to go to work the next morning I decided to call it a night early. The good news is, an early night to me is a late night for trick or treaters and I don't feel overwhelmed with all the children running around the streets on my way home, because there are none. Thank freaking school night!
I hopped in the shower and ignored the little spider way up in the corner. I watched some more tv before putting my costume on for the last time. Different fishnets, new top and after a stop in the kitchen to grab an unopened bag of chips and some salsa to take with and I was on my way to the Halloween Rock Band party.
When I got to T and A's house there were trick or treaters tick or treating so I waited for them to finish before I walked to the door. Was I giving them space to make them more comfortable or avoiding contact with children? Probably option B.
Of course everyone looked awesome. These people are seriously creative. Rock Band was already in full swing, as it usually is when I go over there, so I took a seat at the table...you know, near the food. A was just setting out her homemade pumpkin spice chocolate chip muffins and holy crap they were amazing! I ate like 14 of them (ok, maybe 4). I wasn't sitting down for long before T was accepting my challenge. I challenged him? He pulled out connect 4 and set it in front of me. Ok, I will accept your acceptance of my challenge. I win.
New challenger. After a long game and much thought on both our parts...I lose. Damn. Good game sir.
New challenger. She keeps forgetting to think ahead and gets trapped. I have 2 possible wins and she can only block one. She gives in. Win.
Then she's volunteered to sing Lady Gaga. She doesn't totally want to but she is easily convinced. And doesn't sound bad actually. Gypsy's got talent (enough for Rock Band anyway).
Drunk T made me recall Drunk T stories from years past. Of course I start off with the night he and his friends woke me up at 2 am to play twister with them only to have them watch me play twister by myself. How could I say no to the giggling drunks outside my door?
They make T-virus shots, because they're awesome. Twisted twizzlers in the shot glass. Looks like a strand of DNA (abstractish) and apparently taste super good. But don't eat the twizzler if it's been sitting in there long like Z's was. Not so good apparently.
A made Z put on a blond wig. He wouldn't accept help from her or his girlfriend so for 15 minutes we watched put it on, try to straighten it, take it off, fix his real hair, try the wig again, mess it up, take it off, put it on, try the upside down flip technique. I've never seen a wig look so bad so many different ways in such a short amount of time. He finally broke down and let his girlfriend take care of it. Only, that didn't help. Turns out this particular wig on top of his own hair (even when they tried to put his bandanna over the wig) just wasn't working. It was good entertainment though, watching a guy try and fail at putting on a simple wig for so long. I would have expected him to give up long before he did. Persistence: sometimes doesn't work.
You know what's funny about T? He is insanely good at most video games I've seen him play. Back in the day this guy was the master of DDR. I mean... the freaking MASTER! Now here he is, drunk, and playing the drums better than ever before on Rock Band. Who gets better timing and coordination when they're drunk? This dude! One of his newer friends seems shocked by this but it seemed totally normal to me. Him hitting every single note right is totally par for the course with this guy. There are so many notes flying across that screen and he effortlessly hits them all. I can't even keep up with my eyes. It's like watching magic.
Due to it being Sunday night and me having to get up early to go to work the next morning I decided to call it a night early. The good news is, an early night to me is a late night for trick or treaters and I don't feel overwhelmed with all the children running around the streets on my way home, because there are none. Thank freaking school night!
Halloween: Night 2
There I am, sitting in my recliner minding my own business, watching TV with C, when we hear a knock on the door. Since it's daylight and C is home I get up to see who it is. I peek through the blinds and see a woman...with a child. A child...at my house? Who could this be?
So I open the door. The first thing I notice is the clearly religion related pamphlets in the womans hand. You knocked on the wrong door lady. She asks if I've accepted Jesus as my lord and savior. I'm a bit stunned and stutter for a second. Thank you but I'm not interested. That's not enough. She asks if I know of Jesus. Well of course I do. Who doesn't really? Well maybe she can teach me she starts to offer...I stop her mid thought and tell her no offense but I'm just not interested. Still not enough?! Ok, I don't want to be rude....especially in front of the little girl (clever scheme bible thumpers....clever...) but I'm not interested and if they would look at those pumpkins they're standing a couple feet from they would realize they are at the wrooooonnnnng house. I say thank you again and I'm not interested again as I start to close the door in her face while she gave me judgey eyes. Sorry lady, but I told you.
Clarification: I have nothing against Jesus. In fact, I just partied with him the night before and he's a cool dude. I have nothing against people trying to spread the word about their faith in the hopes of helping others. Having faith is an awesome thing. It's not for me, but it's great for a lot of people and I'm not opposed to talking about things and contemplating and learning but I don't want to talk to someone who thinks I am a heathen for simply not believing the same things. I don't want someone to preach to me. I don't want someone to judge me because isn't God the only one that can judge me anyway? So get your judgey eyes and child away from my pornkin having, heathenism encouraging fun house.
I spent some time getting my costume together. Without the ribbons to worry about I decided to throw on some fishnets and grabbed my feather boa to keep my neck warm for the night. E picked me up around 6:30 and we headed out to an awesome house party.
The place was decorated perfectly. Webs, fake spiders, strobe lights, hanging shackles on the walls and mounds of snack foods. The DJ was setting up when we walked in. We headed straight for the food and said hi to our friends and his family. I headed upstairs to hang out with a couple of my friends. All the rooms upstairs were set up for hanging out. Tons of places to sit, different music in each room, a candy bowl for each room and different decoration themes in each. I got attacked by some little green guy with no legs who kept screaming about being hungry. There was a hand stuck in the corner that kept trying to escape and scaring me. There were many fights over the good candy in the candy bowls. We ended up having to switch our bowl out with the one from the hall because it was fuller. We spent a couple hours just mingling with new people, eating tons of junk food and listing to the DJ.
Almost no one there was in a store bought costume. It is so much more interesting to see home made costumes and there are no repeats. Even the few people in store bought costumes had ones that I hadn't seen before and that looked awesome. Candy Corn girl and the Chilean Miner won the costume contest. I didn't even know there was a contest until A handed me a home made candy wreath with a skull hanging in the middle. This thing is seriously the coolest. Runner up prize = kick assness. Be jealous. Or not. I don't care.
My fishnets kept getting stuck the the chairs I sat in so I ended up sitting on the floor a lot which is way more fun in a tutu. I love poofy tutus. The eliminate the need to sit like a lady cuz you can't see anything through all the poof. I should wear tutus all the time.
There was a long moment where I thought K was going to kill the tv in our room because it was set to 80's music which he apparently hates and we couldn't find a remote to change the channel. He took a chance and turned the tv off and all 8 people in the room stopped talking and looked at him the second he pushed the power button. He turned it back on. War lost.
Eventually everyone started to leave at the same time. I think we were all bloated from eating way too much candy. Bloated girl in a tutu doesn't look cute when she waddles.
So I open the door. The first thing I notice is the clearly religion related pamphlets in the womans hand. You knocked on the wrong door lady. She asks if I've accepted Jesus as my lord and savior. I'm a bit stunned and stutter for a second. Thank you but I'm not interested. That's not enough. She asks if I know of Jesus. Well of course I do. Who doesn't really? Well maybe she can teach me she starts to offer...I stop her mid thought and tell her no offense but I'm just not interested. Still not enough?! Ok, I don't want to be rude....especially in front of the little girl (clever scheme bible thumpers....clever...) but I'm not interested and if they would look at those pumpkins they're standing a couple feet from they would realize they are at the wrooooonnnnng house. I say thank you again and I'm not interested again as I start to close the door in her face while she gave me judgey eyes. Sorry lady, but I told you.
Clarification: I have nothing against Jesus. In fact, I just partied with him the night before and he's a cool dude. I have nothing against people trying to spread the word about their faith in the hopes of helping others. Having faith is an awesome thing. It's not for me, but it's great for a lot of people and I'm not opposed to talking about things and contemplating and learning but I don't want to talk to someone who thinks I am a heathen for simply not believing the same things. I don't want someone to preach to me. I don't want someone to judge me because isn't God the only one that can judge me anyway? So get your judgey eyes and child away from my pornkin having, heathenism encouraging fun house.
I spent some time getting my costume together. Without the ribbons to worry about I decided to throw on some fishnets and grabbed my feather boa to keep my neck warm for the night. E picked me up around 6:30 and we headed out to an awesome house party.
The place was decorated perfectly. Webs, fake spiders, strobe lights, hanging shackles on the walls and mounds of snack foods. The DJ was setting up when we walked in. We headed straight for the food and said hi to our friends and his family. I headed upstairs to hang out with a couple of my friends. All the rooms upstairs were set up for hanging out. Tons of places to sit, different music in each room, a candy bowl for each room and different decoration themes in each. I got attacked by some little green guy with no legs who kept screaming about being hungry. There was a hand stuck in the corner that kept trying to escape and scaring me. There were many fights over the good candy in the candy bowls. We ended up having to switch our bowl out with the one from the hall because it was fuller. We spent a couple hours just mingling with new people, eating tons of junk food and listing to the DJ.
Almost no one there was in a store bought costume. It is so much more interesting to see home made costumes and there are no repeats. Even the few people in store bought costumes had ones that I hadn't seen before and that looked awesome. Candy Corn girl and the Chilean Miner won the costume contest. I didn't even know there was a contest until A handed me a home made candy wreath with a skull hanging in the middle. This thing is seriously the coolest. Runner up prize = kick assness. Be jealous. Or not. I don't care.
My fishnets kept getting stuck the the chairs I sat in so I ended up sitting on the floor a lot which is way more fun in a tutu. I love poofy tutus. The eliminate the need to sit like a lady cuz you can't see anything through all the poof. I should wear tutus all the time.
There was a long moment where I thought K was going to kill the tv in our room because it was set to 80's music which he apparently hates and we couldn't find a remote to change the channel. He took a chance and turned the tv off and all 8 people in the room stopped talking and looked at him the second he pushed the power button. He turned it back on. War lost.
Eventually everyone started to leave at the same time. I think we were all bloated from eating way too much candy. Bloated girl in a tutu doesn't look cute when she waddles.
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Halloween: Night 1
I didn't buy one of those already made, don't have to think about it costumes for Halloween so even though we had a costume party to go to Friday night, Friday was the first time I had put all my costume pieces together and got to see the completed look. I was mostly happy with it, but it changed every time I wore it. For Friday I had on my tutus and a black tank top with shiny shoes and red ribbon tied around my leg to resemble a ballerina. The problem was the stupid ribbons kept falling down off my legs. Even though I had over an hour to get ready before K got to my house (carpooling is awesome) I still hadn't figured out a way to secure my leg ribbons and ended up tying them so tight around my legs that they were leaving marks. Not that I cared as long as they stayed up. But they still weren't.
When K got to my house she ran straight to the bedroom to change in to Minnie Mouse (costumepooling is also awesome) and we were ready to go. Funnily enough C, K and I were all wearing costumes with red and black as the main colors. Because we're awesome like that and like to color coordinate so you can tell we're a team.
We headed out to A and S's after figuring out how to buckle with a fluffy tutu. Once we got there I handed A the last couple pieces to her costume (I'm telling you, costumepooling is the way to go!). I had to retie my legs....again and after a couple of hallway pics we took off to party in the woods.
D and S just got an awesome chunk of land way out by the moutainish in the woodsish so they hosted an awesome Halloween party. There was already a ton of people there when we got there around 8 and more and more people kept showing up. The drink station was set up in the garage area and there were snacks in the kitchen. We said hello to our friends and ogled Ws kick ass costume. He had no skin. He was wearing a full body leotard with muscles and veins drawn on by hand in the most amazing way. He looked incredible! Time to start drinking. A round of ruby slippers to start followed by jungle juice. We stayed in the house a majority of the time in the beginning because it was certainly cold outside. Plus all the snacks were inside.
We check out the whiteboard and see that Sissy Spacek and Sammy Davis Jr had already stopped by and left a note. Oh and Alf. Great American Super Hero (who is clearly drunk and whose blond curly wig does not at all match his dark beard...) decides to sign too. He grabs a marker and studies the board. "GMH. There. That's how he'd sign it on checks."
Except that GMH isn't the right acronym for Great American Super Hero. But, yea, sure. Whatever you say GMH.
He really is the absolute BEST quote source ever but I can't keep up with him! By the time I register what he says and try to make a note he's saying something even more funny and I forget the last thing and then he's saying something else. I wish I could have stopped laughing long enough to write some of his gems down. Actually no, I don't wish that because I enjoyed the laughter.
In between the kitchen and living room is a staircase leading downstairs that has no railing. I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this. You can't? What if I told you K really likes jungle juice?
I don't remember exactly what K was talking to us about but she was all by herself by that dangerous staircase. She took a couple steps back and came close to the stairs. Careful friend. Before I could say anything one foot went down the stairs and in the most graceful move I've witnessed K went from standing on the right side of the stairs to sitting very lady like, legs crossed and all, on the left side all wrapped up in fake webs looking slightly confused but also very calm.
"Hey guys, that didn't happen."
Sorry K. It was too awesome not to write about.
C gets harassed by a small mexican man. He keeps calling her a hot little devil fairy.She seeks refuge inside the house just in time to see Ks graceful drunkenness. We decide to mingle in the garage to keep K away from the dangerous stairs...and get away from the now ruined web decorations.
It seems like everyone is out there. Even Jesus. We catch up with everyone. A tells us how cool we are and how much she loves us and how everyone loves us because we're so awesome. Drunk friends are totally the best for self esteem boosts.
K and I head upstairs to hang out with S where it's not so crowded and we can actually hear each other talk. Drunk K starts asking questions about life and afterlife and all sorts of things her drunk brain are dying to know about. S answers as much as she can and then decides to head back downstairs to the party. K and I get up to head down and everything is fine (though I'm worried about going down the actual stairs because there are no railings out here and is even more drunk now) until we get to the top of the stairs and she spots a closed door. Drunk curiosity is no fun for sober people. She wants to open the door. I tell her this is someones apartment and we can't just go opening doors. She says it might be a coat closet so what's the harm? It might not be a closet. And it's not our house so we shouldn't just look around. Now K is laughing too hard to try and fight me. She runs back into the room we were sitting in and uses the counter near the wall to steady herself while she laughs her drunk laugh (which, yes, is very different than her sober laugh) I try to help her breath normal and stop laughing so hard so we can make it downstairs.
This process repeats a couple of times. I was literally trapped upstairs with her for like 15 minutes.
She finally promises we can go downstairs and she won't open the door but she will ask S where the door goes as soon as she gets downstairs because she has to pee but maybe she should pee and then ask or ask on her way to pee or pee and then come look on her own. Long sentence? That's how she made the plan. We both make it down the stairs without falling (thank god) and she beelines it to the house to complete the pee part of her plan.
I find C outside and she asks where we've been. I tell her drunk K trapped me in a fit of laughter upstairs. I suppose you would expect me to either be irritated at dealing with a stubborn drunkard or tell me I should have just left her by herself. The truth is while I had a couple of moments or real worry mostly I was laughing just as much as K was. Even when I tried not to her laughing was definitely contagious. I was having as much fun laughing at her craziness as she was.
Now that the bladder has been relieved K is ready for picture taking. She takes the camera and runs off taking pictures or everyone. She beckons me outside to play photographer. We take group pictures, the annual W surround by cleavage pic, pictures of me doing ballerina things and C doing devil fairy things and K climbing the roof (tough to explain to trust me, not nearly as dangerous as it sounds).
K decides it's time to take an adventure walk and it takes 3 of us to convince her it's a bad idea especially considering she's wearing tallish shoes and the road is unpaved. We follow after her trying to get her to stop and she walks in a circle ignoring us. When she's facing the house again she says "See guys, it wasn't that bad". We only walked for like 10 feet. I'm not complaining.
We go inside to warm up and I get kidnapped by K. She steals me away into the bathroom for an impromptu photo shoot. Whoops. forgot the camera. Pretty sure everyone out there thinks something else is going on when K pokes her head out the door and asks someone to hand her the camera. We climb around and take pictures of us hiding and being weird. Lots of weirdness.
After I'm released I grab a soda and K decides to sit down for a minute. Looks like she might have the spins...
She sits on the couch and I chat with people in the kitchen. Someone looks at K sideways and asks if she's going to be ok. I tell them she's fine and just needs to sit for a minute. Then, almost as if to defy me, K gets up and goes outside for fresh air. I go outside to check on her and she is just sitting on a bench soaking up the fresh air. She says shes ok but just needs a minute. I'm freezing so I tell her I'll come back and check on her soon if she doesn't come in. I don't even have to wait that long before A comes in to get me. She says K doesn't look so good so I go out and ask her if she's ready to go home and she says she is. We gather our things (C borrows the best pair of bedazzled devil horns I've seen from A for the weekend and I grab my purse and leg ribbons which have refused to stay on all night) and pile into the car. I make a 49 point turn to get out of the packed unpaved driveway.
K falls asleep quick laying in the back seat while I drive through the curvy roads. As we get closer to town C suggests we stop by the bar for a minute before we get home. Since the bar is on the way home and I don't really want to drive all the way home and then all the way back to the bar like we planned I figure we might as well.
We pull up to the bar just as KJ pappy is taking a smoke break. K says she wants to wait in the car so I leave it running for her and leave the radio on. I contemplate grabbing my purse but we're just going to run up and say hi and K is in the car anyway so I leave it but I take my phone and tell K to text me if she needs me to take her home pronto style. KJ is happy to see us but not happy that we're not staying. It's busier than usual but we might be the only ones there in costume. Good thing I'm not going inside. C runs in to take advantage of the bathroom and I chat with a woman outside while keeping an eye on my running car with sick/drunk K inside. C comes running back outside and we're ready to go. We get in the car and head home.
When we get to the house I realize my purse isn't in the car. I could have sworn it was right here....I look. K looks. We go inside and C looks in the car one more time. K heads straight for PJ's and C and I head back to the bar to see if maybe, possibly, by the grace of some divine being, my purse is in the parking lot there.
Of course it's not. Someone had stolen it. I don't know when, or how because I was outside the whole time, K was in the car and though she was sick and had been wasted, it took us at least 20 minutes to get from the party to the bar (and that's at least. I'm pretty sure it was longer) and she was awake when we got there. She heard us get out and back in the car so she would have heard someone else get into the car...right? I never even went inside the bar. I just don't get it.
Drunk A texts me and tells me I didn't leave my purse at the party. They looked. Thanks for looking guys, but I knew that and I thought I made it clear to her that I didn't leave it there but it's better to check right? My friends are so good to me.
What did I lose? My ribbons for my costume. My awesome frog card holder my mom got me with my ID, debit card, and a few other cards...one of which can't be replaced. Damn it. My last lip gloss (where do all my lip glosses go?), $50 in cash and most devastating at all....my camera. With months worth of pictures on it. That is really the only thing I'm upset about. I'm confused about how it happened and super bummed about losing all those awesome pictures. Things happen though, and it certainly could have been worse. It sucks but I'll live.
I called the bank as soon as I was sure my stuff was gone. Thankfully they have 24 hour customer support. They ask for my account number and I say that my purse was stolen and I just want to cancel my card. They ask for my full name, my address, my social security number, the last deposit I made but because I can't remember the last withdrawal (because I honestly almost never get cash I have no idea the last time I got money out because it was probably weeks ago and I can barely remember what happened yesterday. I just have no concept of time...) they can't confirm that I am really me and won't cancel my card and send me a new one. They will freeze the card so it can't be used but I have to go in to the bank in person to cancel my card. Oh cuz that will totally work with my lack of ID and my lack of cash to get an ID and lack of time to spend at the DMV getting a new ID. Why is this society set up to make things impossible? You need thing a to get thing b but you need thing b in order to get thing a. So dumb.
Since we were already back at the bar we stayed until closing. KJ had a few too many beers and needed a ride home. As we got into my car I notice people getting into the car parked next to mine. A couple people pile in the back seat...and then another squeezes in. The driver gets in. Then the passenger and then someone crawls on top of the passengers lap. They're in a 2 door little teeny tiny compact hatch back car and they are totally packed like sardines. There is no way I can not laugh. At least I can get a good laugh in after I lost my purse. Thanks sardine car.
KJ decided he wasn't ready to go home so we took a couple trips over our favorite bump and tried to catch some air. We had a couple good runs, but we've had better. It's hard to hit the light right in the middle of the night because it's one of those that doesn't change until the sensor is tripped and when you're the only car on the road it's hard to trip it and get enough speed to hit the bump good. Oh well, it was still fun.
KJ wanted to keep driving around but I was low on gas, and with my money being stolen I couldn't fill up so we called it a night.
When K got to my house she ran straight to the bedroom to change in to Minnie Mouse (costumepooling is also awesome) and we were ready to go. Funnily enough C, K and I were all wearing costumes with red and black as the main colors. Because we're awesome like that and like to color coordinate so you can tell we're a team.
We headed out to A and S's after figuring out how to buckle with a fluffy tutu. Once we got there I handed A the last couple pieces to her costume (I'm telling you, costumepooling is the way to go!). I had to retie my legs....again and after a couple of hallway pics we took off to party in the woods.
D and S just got an awesome chunk of land way out by the moutainish in the woodsish so they hosted an awesome Halloween party. There was already a ton of people there when we got there around 8 and more and more people kept showing up. The drink station was set up in the garage area and there were snacks in the kitchen. We said hello to our friends and ogled Ws kick ass costume. He had no skin. He was wearing a full body leotard with muscles and veins drawn on by hand in the most amazing way. He looked incredible! Time to start drinking. A round of ruby slippers to start followed by jungle juice. We stayed in the house a majority of the time in the beginning because it was certainly cold outside. Plus all the snacks were inside.
We check out the whiteboard and see that Sissy Spacek and Sammy Davis Jr had already stopped by and left a note. Oh and Alf. Great American Super Hero (who is clearly drunk and whose blond curly wig does not at all match his dark beard...) decides to sign too. He grabs a marker and studies the board. "GMH. There. That's how he'd sign it on checks."
Except that GMH isn't the right acronym for Great American Super Hero. But, yea, sure. Whatever you say GMH.
He really is the absolute BEST quote source ever but I can't keep up with him! By the time I register what he says and try to make a note he's saying something even more funny and I forget the last thing and then he's saying something else. I wish I could have stopped laughing long enough to write some of his gems down. Actually no, I don't wish that because I enjoyed the laughter.
In between the kitchen and living room is a staircase leading downstairs that has no railing. I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this. You can't? What if I told you K really likes jungle juice?
I don't remember exactly what K was talking to us about but she was all by herself by that dangerous staircase. She took a couple steps back and came close to the stairs. Careful friend. Before I could say anything one foot went down the stairs and in the most graceful move I've witnessed K went from standing on the right side of the stairs to sitting very lady like, legs crossed and all, on the left side all wrapped up in fake webs looking slightly confused but also very calm.
"Hey guys, that didn't happen."
Sorry K. It was too awesome not to write about.
C gets harassed by a small mexican man. He keeps calling her a hot little devil fairy.She seeks refuge inside the house just in time to see Ks graceful drunkenness. We decide to mingle in the garage to keep K away from the dangerous stairs...and get away from the now ruined web decorations.
It seems like everyone is out there. Even Jesus. We catch up with everyone. A tells us how cool we are and how much she loves us and how everyone loves us because we're so awesome. Drunk friends are totally the best for self esteem boosts.
K and I head upstairs to hang out with S where it's not so crowded and we can actually hear each other talk. Drunk K starts asking questions about life and afterlife and all sorts of things her drunk brain are dying to know about. S answers as much as she can and then decides to head back downstairs to the party. K and I get up to head down and everything is fine (though I'm worried about going down the actual stairs because there are no railings out here and is even more drunk now) until we get to the top of the stairs and she spots a closed door. Drunk curiosity is no fun for sober people. She wants to open the door. I tell her this is someones apartment and we can't just go opening doors. She says it might be a coat closet so what's the harm? It might not be a closet. And it's not our house so we shouldn't just look around. Now K is laughing too hard to try and fight me. She runs back into the room we were sitting in and uses the counter near the wall to steady herself while she laughs her drunk laugh (which, yes, is very different than her sober laugh) I try to help her breath normal and stop laughing so hard so we can make it downstairs.
This process repeats a couple of times. I was literally trapped upstairs with her for like 15 minutes.
She finally promises we can go downstairs and she won't open the door but she will ask S where the door goes as soon as she gets downstairs because she has to pee but maybe she should pee and then ask or ask on her way to pee or pee and then come look on her own. Long sentence? That's how she made the plan. We both make it down the stairs without falling (thank god) and she beelines it to the house to complete the pee part of her plan.
I find C outside and she asks where we've been. I tell her drunk K trapped me in a fit of laughter upstairs. I suppose you would expect me to either be irritated at dealing with a stubborn drunkard or tell me I should have just left her by herself. The truth is while I had a couple of moments or real worry mostly I was laughing just as much as K was. Even when I tried not to her laughing was definitely contagious. I was having as much fun laughing at her craziness as she was.
Now that the bladder has been relieved K is ready for picture taking. She takes the camera and runs off taking pictures or everyone. She beckons me outside to play photographer. We take group pictures, the annual W surround by cleavage pic, pictures of me doing ballerina things and C doing devil fairy things and K climbing the roof (tough to explain to trust me, not nearly as dangerous as it sounds).
K decides it's time to take an adventure walk and it takes 3 of us to convince her it's a bad idea especially considering she's wearing tallish shoes and the road is unpaved. We follow after her trying to get her to stop and she walks in a circle ignoring us. When she's facing the house again she says "See guys, it wasn't that bad". We only walked for like 10 feet. I'm not complaining.
We go inside to warm up and I get kidnapped by K. She steals me away into the bathroom for an impromptu photo shoot. Whoops. forgot the camera. Pretty sure everyone out there thinks something else is going on when K pokes her head out the door and asks someone to hand her the camera. We climb around and take pictures of us hiding and being weird. Lots of weirdness.
After I'm released I grab a soda and K decides to sit down for a minute. Looks like she might have the spins...
She sits on the couch and I chat with people in the kitchen. Someone looks at K sideways and asks if she's going to be ok. I tell them she's fine and just needs to sit for a minute. Then, almost as if to defy me, K gets up and goes outside for fresh air. I go outside to check on her and she is just sitting on a bench soaking up the fresh air. She says shes ok but just needs a minute. I'm freezing so I tell her I'll come back and check on her soon if she doesn't come in. I don't even have to wait that long before A comes in to get me. She says K doesn't look so good so I go out and ask her if she's ready to go home and she says she is. We gather our things (C borrows the best pair of bedazzled devil horns I've seen from A for the weekend and I grab my purse and leg ribbons which have refused to stay on all night) and pile into the car. I make a 49 point turn to get out of the packed unpaved driveway.
K falls asleep quick laying in the back seat while I drive through the curvy roads. As we get closer to town C suggests we stop by the bar for a minute before we get home. Since the bar is on the way home and I don't really want to drive all the way home and then all the way back to the bar like we planned I figure we might as well.
We pull up to the bar just as KJ pappy is taking a smoke break. K says she wants to wait in the car so I leave it running for her and leave the radio on. I contemplate grabbing my purse but we're just going to run up and say hi and K is in the car anyway so I leave it but I take my phone and tell K to text me if she needs me to take her home pronto style. KJ is happy to see us but not happy that we're not staying. It's busier than usual but we might be the only ones there in costume. Good thing I'm not going inside. C runs in to take advantage of the bathroom and I chat with a woman outside while keeping an eye on my running car with sick/drunk K inside. C comes running back outside and we're ready to go. We get in the car and head home.
When we get to the house I realize my purse isn't in the car. I could have sworn it was right here....I look. K looks. We go inside and C looks in the car one more time. K heads straight for PJ's and C and I head back to the bar to see if maybe, possibly, by the grace of some divine being, my purse is in the parking lot there.
Of course it's not. Someone had stolen it. I don't know when, or how because I was outside the whole time, K was in the car and though she was sick and had been wasted, it took us at least 20 minutes to get from the party to the bar (and that's at least. I'm pretty sure it was longer) and she was awake when we got there. She heard us get out and back in the car so she would have heard someone else get into the car...right? I never even went inside the bar. I just don't get it.
Drunk A texts me and tells me I didn't leave my purse at the party. They looked. Thanks for looking guys, but I knew that and I thought I made it clear to her that I didn't leave it there but it's better to check right? My friends are so good to me.
What did I lose? My ribbons for my costume. My awesome frog card holder my mom got me with my ID, debit card, and a few other cards...one of which can't be replaced. Damn it. My last lip gloss (where do all my lip glosses go?), $50 in cash and most devastating at all....my camera. With months worth of pictures on it. That is really the only thing I'm upset about. I'm confused about how it happened and super bummed about losing all those awesome pictures. Things happen though, and it certainly could have been worse. It sucks but I'll live.
I called the bank as soon as I was sure my stuff was gone. Thankfully they have 24 hour customer support. They ask for my account number and I say that my purse was stolen and I just want to cancel my card. They ask for my full name, my address, my social security number, the last deposit I made but because I can't remember the last withdrawal (because I honestly almost never get cash I have no idea the last time I got money out because it was probably weeks ago and I can barely remember what happened yesterday. I just have no concept of time...) they can't confirm that I am really me and won't cancel my card and send me a new one. They will freeze the card so it can't be used but I have to go in to the bank in person to cancel my card. Oh cuz that will totally work with my lack of ID and my lack of cash to get an ID and lack of time to spend at the DMV getting a new ID. Why is this society set up to make things impossible? You need thing a to get thing b but you need thing b in order to get thing a. So dumb.
Since we were already back at the bar we stayed until closing. KJ had a few too many beers and needed a ride home. As we got into my car I notice people getting into the car parked next to mine. A couple people pile in the back seat...and then another squeezes in. The driver gets in. Then the passenger and then someone crawls on top of the passengers lap. They're in a 2 door little teeny tiny compact hatch back car and they are totally packed like sardines. There is no way I can not laugh. At least I can get a good laugh in after I lost my purse. Thanks sardine car.
KJ decided he wasn't ready to go home so we took a couple trips over our favorite bump and tried to catch some air. We had a couple good runs, but we've had better. It's hard to hit the light right in the middle of the night because it's one of those that doesn't change until the sensor is tripped and when you're the only car on the road it's hard to trip it and get enough speed to hit the bump good. Oh well, it was still fun.
KJ wanted to keep driving around but I was low on gas, and with my money being stolen I couldn't fill up so we called it a night.
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