Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Walking and mowing

When I woke up Sunday I thought for sure I was on my death bed. My alarm went off around 9:30. I had to go to the AIDS walk with my company and C needed a ride to her friends house to help set up for a childs birthday party. I am so thankful I showered the night before because it is not going to happen right now. Picking up my phone to turn the alarm off hurts. I look at my hands and it looks like they're bruised. Oy vey.
We get in the car and I find out that steering hurts too. My poor arms. And hands. I drop C off and head downtown to meet my coworkers. We do the AIDS walk every year and I'm already awake. I might hurt but I'm already up and I just can't miss the walk again (I missed it once before) so I tell myself it will be over before I know it.
I park at the lot I park at for work. It's a ways away from where the walk starts but I'm already going to be walking, and parking for free is the best so whatever. I try to stick close to the max tracks so if a max comes I can just hop on and ride to the square. No max, keep walking. No max, keep walking. I turn and turn again and 3 blocks from the square I'm heading to, I see the max. Pass me. Awesome.
I get to the square and hope to see some breakfast but I don't see any so I head to the other side of the square where our team meets up. I only see a few people. My boss hugs me hello. She's excited to see me because this years group is so small.
My entire upper body is killing me and we still have about half an hour before the walk starts so I zombie my way through the next 30 minutes. I lean against a wall, crouch near the ground. I feel drunk. I'm exhausted and so ready to go back to bed. Are those tie dye jeans?! You are awesome sir. At least there are a lot of fun things to see here.
Finally the walk officially starts. They kick off the walk with a marching band. I love the sound of cadence and it really helps keep you motivated. I wonder if they have CDs of  just marching band music. That would make good work out music. Or maybe that's just my zombie brain talking.
I wish I could remember more to tell you about the walk but my brain was off for most of it so that's basically all I remember. That and contemplating skipping off early from the walk since it ended up going right near my car. Why didn't I? I have no idea.
I made it home around 12:30. I changed into lawn appropriate clothes and went to finish mowing. My hands were killing me and I was sore all over but I had to finish. I don't often have a lot of free time and with over half the back yard to finish still I had to get to it.
I find some more praying mantises. One was almost totally white. Weird. I get to the far left side of the yard and I can see grasshoppers jumping all over the place. I push the mower towards the tree near the fence and somehow spot a ladybug on one strand of tall grass. I know ladybugs are good luck so I pull the mower back. Then I watch a grasshopper jump to the wall on the other side of my fence. I take a closer look at the wall and it has grasshoppers all over it. At least 12 of them at that moment. All taking refuge from the killer mower on that wall. It makes me happy because I hated the thought of killing all those lil guys.
I have to move the trampoline to get the last big section. No easy feat in overgrown grass with broken hands and arms but some how I did it.
Mow mow mow.
Mow some more.
Mow mow mow.
Too much mowing. I can't mow one tiny spot because there are slate stepping stones in the middle of the yard and they are unevenly planted and too far from the house for the weed eater to reach so there's a slightly phallic shaped section of grass out there...too bad landlady! I am not going to cut that by hand.
I hit a rock and hear the mower protest so I turn it off and run away. Well stomp away really. I'm just too exhausted for normal emotions any more. I drink a glass of water, turn on the AC and calm down so I can head back out to finish.
The closer I get to being done the more I can feel the pain in my hands and body. Once all the grass is finally mowed I have to move the trampoline back. Problem is it doesn't want to move. I pull, I push, I tug, I scream, I might cry a little, I try to pull it from side to side. Now I'm just pissed. I want to be done. I let out a hulk like roar and suddenly the trampoline is moving and it's not going to stop until it's where I want it. Adrenaline is awesome.
I throw my gloves off onto the chair outside and stumble inside. I'm in complete breakdown mode now. I can't handle my emotions, and combined with my exhaustion I'm basically doomed. I get my shoes and (grass stained) socks off in the kitchen so I don't track dirt and dead bug guts into the house and then I completely give up and I'm laying on the floor sobbing.
I was there for at least half an hour before I could finally muster the strength to shower. Again, I was too shaky after my shower to try to put make up on. Good thing I don't have anywhere to be.
Guess who doesn't ever want to mow again? This chick.

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